Saturday 18 August 2012
Sugar Test
Akpos goes into a chemist, reaches into his pocket and takes out a small bottle and a teaspoon. He pours some liquid onto the teaspoon and offers it to the chemist's assistant."Could you taste this, please?"
News Bits 18-AUG-2012
* 'Boko Haram wears the face of religion but it is political' http://t.co/IipYLLY7". * Divine intervention saves kidnap victim from abductors http://t.co/EloMHlgz".
* Driver, 28, pleads guilty for stealing madam's car http://t.co/QY5p09Ga".
* Separation won't remove all our misfortunes' http://t.co/NqJWFTRo". * Jonathan's survival depends on him – Eichie http://t.co/9EF0Ffmn".
* Uduaghan urged to develop Aniocha South http://t.co/XPoktDC1".
* The Premier League returns tomorrow. THIS should get you pumped -> http://t.co/zg0F6DnC" :D \=D/. * Nigerians lament the new import duty on flour
*small scale bakers may close shops http://t.co/7oKHRLRi".
* Raising Nigeria's education standard needs maximum approach http://t.co/q4eSE5Yz". * Zuma expresses shock over masscare of more than 36 mine workers http://t.co/NPcOF0hv". * Using BlackBerry 7.1? Learn about a new feature: Application Resource Monitor. Read about it ... http://t.co/SuAEzVrO".
* Be your brothers' keeper, Mark urges Nigerians http://t.co/ghN1ORAS" u nko?
* Unless we pray, there won't be election in 2015, foretell White Witches http://t.co/6xUs2FfD". * 938 persons kidnapped in 8 months in South East – CD http://t.co/jKeVJ1A1"@ least.
* Ex-Enugu governor, Chimaroke Nnamani, is alive -Associates - http://t.co/MK088XeB http://t.co/Bn9F239W".
* Gunmen kill former Shehu of Borno's secretary http://t.co/xjFbFpvM".
* Okene killings: Security beefed up around suspects as police begin interrogation http://t.co/Bk10exSA".
* Why I didn't retire Abacha before I left http://t.co/mjOcUHWO".
* Why we applied to UN, AU for recognition – Onwuka http://t.co/CKyN03PV".
* Local government leeches http://t.co/xyDk9FhG".
* Major declaration of independent Bakassi will soon be made http://t.co/QXCVqG2G". * Bayelsa Flag and Coat-of-Arms http://t.co/G8Wn9cvb".
* ASUU boss brutalised as RSUST VC crisis deepens http://t.co/yzvdxbiC".
* PPM issue lingers nationwide http://t.co/vSUlVALO". * Tension in Bayelsa as JTF gunboat, passenger boat collide http://t.co/oA9zCWig"
* PHCN: NLC commences solidarity strike next Wednesday http://t.co/y3w8H2Ee". * Jonathan must be seen to be decisive else Nigeria is gone, says Gen Ikpomwen http://t.co/BI9eJPmG".
* Nigerians speak on Ogoni, Bakassi political autonomy http://t.co/yPDQrvtw".
* Fear grips Enugu community as Fulani herdsmen kill 2 teenagers http://t.co/g2KFIBd4".
* 15 students paraded over illegal possession of army uniform http://t.co/x44Y8XBt". * Structuring Nollywood: The MOPICON option http://t.co/0U7GKEpA"e wan spoil o
* Ex Nollywood actress battles breast cancer http://t.co/wudvpr05".
* Bolt under pressure to break up with girlfriend http://t.co/yHLpgfOb"he wan run.
* Driver, 28, pleads guilty for stealing madam's car http://t.co/QY5p09Ga".
* Separation won't remove all our misfortunes' http://t.co/NqJWFTRo". * Jonathan's survival depends on him – Eichie http://t.co/9EF0Ffmn".
* Uduaghan urged to develop Aniocha South http://t.co/XPoktDC1".
* The Premier League returns tomorrow. THIS should get you pumped -> http://t.co/zg0F6DnC" :D \=D/. * Nigerians lament the new import duty on flour
*small scale bakers may close shops http://t.co/7oKHRLRi".
* Raising Nigeria's education standard needs maximum approach http://t.co/q4eSE5Yz". * Zuma expresses shock over masscare of more than 36 mine workers http://t.co/NPcOF0hv". * Using BlackBerry 7.1? Learn about a new feature: Application Resource Monitor. Read about it ... http://t.co/SuAEzVrO".
* Be your brothers' keeper, Mark urges Nigerians http://t.co/ghN1ORAS" u nko?
* Unless we pray, there won't be election in 2015, foretell White Witches http://t.co/6xUs2FfD". * 938 persons kidnapped in 8 months in South East – CD http://t.co/jKeVJ1A1"@ least.
* Ex-Enugu governor, Chimaroke Nnamani, is alive -Associates - http://t.co/MK088XeB http://t.co/Bn9F239W".
* Gunmen kill former Shehu of Borno's secretary http://t.co/xjFbFpvM".
* Okene killings: Security beefed up around suspects as police begin interrogation http://t.co/Bk10exSA".
* Why I didn't retire Abacha before I left http://t.co/mjOcUHWO".
* Why we applied to UN, AU for recognition – Onwuka http://t.co/CKyN03PV".
* Local government leeches http://t.co/xyDk9FhG".
* Major declaration of independent Bakassi will soon be made http://t.co/QXCVqG2G". * Bayelsa Flag and Coat-of-Arms http://t.co/G8Wn9cvb".
* ASUU boss brutalised as RSUST VC crisis deepens http://t.co/yzvdxbiC".
* PPM issue lingers nationwide http://t.co/vSUlVALO". * Tension in Bayelsa as JTF gunboat, passenger boat collide http://t.co/oA9zCWig"
* PHCN: NLC commences solidarity strike next Wednesday http://t.co/y3w8H2Ee". * Jonathan must be seen to be decisive else Nigeria is gone, says Gen Ikpomwen http://t.co/BI9eJPmG".
* Nigerians speak on Ogoni, Bakassi political autonomy http://t.co/yPDQrvtw".
* Fear grips Enugu community as Fulani herdsmen kill 2 teenagers http://t.co/g2KFIBd4".
* 15 students paraded over illegal possession of army uniform http://t.co/x44Y8XBt". * Structuring Nollywood: The MOPICON option http://t.co/0U7GKEpA"e wan spoil o
* Ex Nollywood actress battles breast cancer http://t.co/wudvpr05".
* Bolt under pressure to break up with girlfriend http://t.co/yHLpgfOb"he wan run.
Successful Sons
Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room.
Those who remained talked about their kids.
Those who remained talked about their kids.
419
Mr. 419: Hello, how are you?
Ayo:Fine. Pls, who am I speaking with?
Mr. 419: Haba, don't you remember me? Who do you know in UK dat could be calling?
(Sensing a scam, I threw in a trap…)
Ayo: Johnson! Is that you? (Meanwhile,I don't know any Johnson in UK.) (Thinking it's a break, he swallows the bait)
Ayo:Fine. Pls, who am I speaking with?
Mr. 419: Haba, don't you remember me? Who do you know in UK dat could be calling?
(Sensing a scam, I threw in a trap…)
Ayo: Johnson! Is that you? (Meanwhile,I don't know any Johnson in UK.) (Thinking it's a break, he swallows the bait)
News Update 17-AUG-2012
»National:
*Proposed strike:
FG, Labour meeting deadlocked
*ACN urges Jonathan to sack Okupe
*Oyerinde:
Oshiomhole wants FG to probe Police, SSS contradictions
*Intrigues as Ijesa chief's trial resumes
*Police reform:
Minister says the Presidential Committee is going beyond its brief
*FG Reiterates readiness to discuss with Boko Haram
*Dana coroner:
Plane examined for 12 mins before flight – Witness
*Explosion rocks Ogoniland
*Olubolade rejects advice to scrap Police Ministry
*FAAC withdraws $1bn as excess Crude Account rises to $7.5bn
*FG improves Gas supply to PHCN, NIPP Plants
*Subsidy:
FG Pays N42.6bn to 31 Marketers
*Army Chief:
Ihejirika says "Our efforts are paying off", insists "we must stamp out Terrorism"
*2015:
PDP yet to decide on Jonathan's fate – Babatope
*Jonathan raises white paper panel on police reform report
*Nigeria, India to review air service agreement
*Pension Reforms:
Okonjo-Iweala seeks partnership with ICPC
*Lagos task force persecuting us – Landowners
*ASUU slams Elechi over Ebonyi varsity name-change
*NSCDC arrests five, recovers petrol stored in sacks
*Ogun PDP asks court to sack Oyinlola as party's national secretary
*Alamieyeseigha drums support for state police
*Onitsha traders protest demolition of structures by govt
*PHCN workers call off strike
*Why we are holding talks with Boko Haram – FG
*CBN to issue N71bn Treasury bills
*Nigeria to be included in JP Morgan index
*Govt, gas firms step up stable power bid, to clear N26b debt
*Govt warns masterminds of explosion in Ogoni
*Govt borrowed N42.67b to pay fuel subsidy, says Okonjo-Iweala
*NYSC:
Police deploy bomb detectors to schools, hostels
*Don blames mass failure in WAEC on poor funding of schools
*Deeper Life Okene Attacks:
Human Rights Group claims 'The police arrested the victims not the terrorists'
*Multi-year tariff will end epileptic power supply – Orji
*Gombe releases N120m for scholarship
*Kogi NUT threatens strike
*Constituency petitions INEC against Taraba Deputy Speaker
*CBN cracks down on financial terrorism
*Benue lawmakers seek commissioner's sack
*Man killed over PHCN bill
*Drug abuse in children is on increase – Imo NDLEA
*Kidnapped Judge regains freedom in Delta state
»Foreign:
*Mitt Romney says he paid 'at least 13 percent' in taxes annually for past 10 years
*20,000 Pairs of Fake Designer Shoes Seized In US
*ECOWAS Parliament averted deportation of Nigerians from Ghana
*e-bay bans sale of magic spells and potions
*Tight security for Chelsea million-man party
*HSBC assisting US in tax evasion probe
*'ICC competent to try Gbagbo'
*Pakistan frees 55 Indians
*Argentine ex-president on trial for bribery
*ECOWAS troops only welcome in north – Mali
*Families of slain Iranian scientists sue Israel
*West reneging on Syria deal – Russia
*WikiLeaks:
Ecuadorian Foreign Minister Ricardo Patiño says WikiLeaks founder, Julian Assange, has been granted asylum in Ecuador as he wants to avoid being sent to Sweden to face sexual assault allegations
»Entertainment:
*Nelson Mandela's grandson kicks wife out after DNA test reveals "Son" is His Brother's
*CNN Anderson Cooper calls off engagement with GAY Partner, Ben Maisani, over alleged cheating
*Latest Trending News:
Baby #7 on the way for 2Face as Annie Macaulay is pregnant
*Banky W and Wizkid in alleged US fraud scandal as Wizkid's cancelled California concert stirs angry fans
*Woman Burns 9-year-old House girl in buttocks & private with electric iron
*Son defiles stepmother, claims he was seduced; father confused on whose side to be
*Rihanna opens up to Oprah about Chris Brown: "I lost my best friend"
*Bobby Brown checks himself into rehab for alcohol addiction
*Durbar Festival cancelled
*Husband seeks divorce from fetish wife as she tells court "My husband doesn't want more children, so he pours semen on my stomach"
*Proposed strike:
FG, Labour meeting deadlocked
*ACN urges Jonathan to sack Okupe
*Oyerinde:
Oshiomhole wants FG to probe Police, SSS contradictions
*Intrigues as Ijesa chief's trial resumes
*Police reform:
Minister says the Presidential Committee is going beyond its brief
*FG Reiterates readiness to discuss with Boko Haram
*Dana coroner:
Plane examined for 12 mins before flight – Witness
*Explosion rocks Ogoniland
*Olubolade rejects advice to scrap Police Ministry
*FAAC withdraws $1bn as excess Crude Account rises to $7.5bn
*FG improves Gas supply to PHCN, NIPP Plants
*Subsidy:
FG Pays N42.6bn to 31 Marketers
*Army Chief:
Ihejirika says "Our efforts are paying off", insists "we must stamp out Terrorism"
*2015:
PDP yet to decide on Jonathan's fate – Babatope
*Jonathan raises white paper panel on police reform report
*Nigeria, India to review air service agreement
*Pension Reforms:
Okonjo-Iweala seeks partnership with ICPC
*Lagos task force persecuting us – Landowners
*ASUU slams Elechi over Ebonyi varsity name-change
*NSCDC arrests five, recovers petrol stored in sacks
*Ogun PDP asks court to sack Oyinlola as party's national secretary
*Alamieyeseigha drums support for state police
*Onitsha traders protest demolition of structures by govt
*PHCN workers call off strike
*Why we are holding talks with Boko Haram – FG
*CBN to issue N71bn Treasury bills
*Nigeria to be included in JP Morgan index
*Govt, gas firms step up stable power bid, to clear N26b debt
*Govt warns masterminds of explosion in Ogoni
*Govt borrowed N42.67b to pay fuel subsidy, says Okonjo-Iweala
*NYSC:
Police deploy bomb detectors to schools, hostels
*Don blames mass failure in WAEC on poor funding of schools
*Deeper Life Okene Attacks:
Human Rights Group claims 'The police arrested the victims not the terrorists'
*Multi-year tariff will end epileptic power supply – Orji
*Gombe releases N120m for scholarship
*Kogi NUT threatens strike
*Constituency petitions INEC against Taraba Deputy Speaker
*CBN cracks down on financial terrorism
*Benue lawmakers seek commissioner's sack
*Man killed over PHCN bill
*Drug abuse in children is on increase – Imo NDLEA
*Kidnapped Judge regains freedom in Delta state
»Foreign:
*Mitt Romney says he paid 'at least 13 percent' in taxes annually for past 10 years
*20,000 Pairs of Fake Designer Shoes Seized In US
*ECOWAS Parliament averted deportation of Nigerians from Ghana
*e-bay bans sale of magic spells and potions
*Tight security for Chelsea million-man party
*HSBC assisting US in tax evasion probe
*'ICC competent to try Gbagbo'
*Pakistan frees 55 Indians
*Argentine ex-president on trial for bribery
*ECOWAS troops only welcome in north – Mali
*Families of slain Iranian scientists sue Israel
*West reneging on Syria deal – Russia
*WikiLeaks:
Ecuadorian Foreign Minister Ricardo Patiño says WikiLeaks founder, Julian Assange, has been granted asylum in Ecuador as he wants to avoid being sent to Sweden to face sexual assault allegations
»Entertainment:
*Nelson Mandela's grandson kicks wife out after DNA test reveals "Son" is His Brother's
*CNN Anderson Cooper calls off engagement with GAY Partner, Ben Maisani, over alleged cheating
*Latest Trending News:
Baby #7 on the way for 2Face as Annie Macaulay is pregnant
*Banky W and Wizkid in alleged US fraud scandal as Wizkid's cancelled California concert stirs angry fans
*Woman Burns 9-year-old House girl in buttocks & private with electric iron
*Son defiles stepmother, claims he was seduced; father confused on whose side to be
*Rihanna opens up to Oprah about Chris Brown: "I lost my best friend"
*Bobby Brown checks himself into rehab for alcohol addiction
*Durbar Festival cancelled
*Husband seeks divorce from fetish wife as she tells court "My husband doesn't want more children, so he pours semen on my stomach"
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